One Question That Changed My Life

Has someone ever asked you a question so powerful that it completely shifted the course of your life?

For me, that happened in the most unexpected way. It wasn't a grand philosophical inquiry posed by a coach or therapist. It was a simple, seemingly innocent question posed by a stranger on the street: "Are you the nanny?"

On the surface, it seemed like such a harmless question. Yet, I felt like I was struck by a bolt of lightning.

I froze and didn't know how to respond. I mean, I had heard the same story told by other people of color moms with multiracial children, but knowing it happened to someone else didn't help me respond to the situation. Instead, I froze outwardly but felt like I was burning with anger and washed by shame inside.

As an immigrant and a Chinese/Taiwanese woman, I'm told to never confront someone.
Just walk away because they don't know any better. However, when this happened that day with my child as a witness, I felt I could no longer just walk away. Because I knew this wouldn't be the last time the question would be asked.

So, what could I do? I didn't have an answer right away for this stranger. But I promised myself, from this moment forward, I would learn everything I can so that my multiracial child doesn't have to witness my anguish in silence, like her mother and her mother’s mother.

And that's how I found myself on a path I never imagined. Fueled by that pivotal question, I went back to school, obtained a certification in body-psychotherapy, and furthered my pursuit of becoming a DEIB consultant and facilitator. You see, I want to help people know that they, too, have a voice, and that their voice matters – even with their imperfect English and the complexion of their skin.

Now, it's your turn. Have you ever been asked a question that sparked a shift in your life's trajectory? Drop me an email, and share your story!